I stumbled out of my slumber this morning with a scream stuck in my gut. “Oh God! I really can’t look at another human being or much worse speak to one, today.” I thought, as I tried to make sense of the time. I needed a break from the  routine of the past month. I’ve always wanted to try leading a monotonous existence, just to see if I can. So I did. This is what it looked like. Get up in the morning.. go for work..come back..grab a bite..rush to the gym…go for a drive… chat for ten minutes…eat…watch tele and sleep. Once a week catch up with an acquaintance.

As much as I enjoyed proving to myself I could, it was time to catch up, with moi. So, I lay in bed alternatively staring at the ceiling and the photograph of my brother, that  hangs over my bed. Soon, I fell into a reverie. Around late afternoon, I needed my head to be filled with an interesting thought.

A few days ago, a book- The Winner Stands Alone by Paulo Coelho, had found me. So I turned to it and Voila! on Page 53, I found the answer to a question, I wish I’d asked.

Javits- the second character a film distributor, who is murdered by the protagonist -Igor; keeps a list of what it means to be ‘normal’. He shares this with his two ‘friends'(bodyguards), while he waits for someone to arrive.

”Normal is anything that makes us forget who we are and what we want; that way we can work in order to produce, reproduce and earn money.”

”Working from to nine to five every day at something that gives you no pleasure at all just so that after thirty years you can retire.”

”Keeping a smile on your lips even when you are on the verge of tears. Feeling sorry for those who show their feelings.”

”Believing your parents are always right.”

”Swearing when in heavy traffic.” And so on and so forth.

I wonder what my definition of normal would be. Standing with the majority or feeling superior to someone who obviously has far less than you- these are quite normal. I’m going to think about it while I get shuteye.