Recently a number of individuals have been fretting about how secretive I am. It’s just left me baffled. I was also asked by a magazine to reveal something about myself that no one knows.
That’s a bloody long list. The only thing I don’t hide or let’s put it this way, was most forthcoming about was my Love life. That also only because there are two people involved and I don’t like giving anybody the power to have anything over me. Plus, what a cliche it is to hide romantic liaisons! What you consider personal is not really personal to me!
You know what is really personal-what I know, what I feel, what I do, what I read, what music I listen to, who I aspire to be! That’s personal. The answer to most of these questions vary from I don’t know, nothing in particular or I don’t think about it. Nine times out of ten I get away with it, but unfortunately sometimes I get caught at the leg pulling and people get really mad at me. I don’t get why?
One of the boys I dated and almost married (I was wearing an engagement band at 20), was on his way to becoming a life coach. Hence, the fascination with moi-I make a fine subject (just kidding). Anyway, like most people he loved the sound of his own voice, so he would ask me a question, I would say I don’t know, as usual and he would jump into a monologue. Now you may wonder why I do this. There are a couple of reasons. I have a limited amount of time, very little energy and zero tolerance for silly social games.
The only people I have a real conversation with, are those who are interested in one. If the idea of the talk is for you to want to sound like the smartest person in the room, I will just nod my head and let you. If you are trying to get information out of me, I will either snap at you or just make up shit to confuse you. I feel absolutely no qualms in lying to underplay it, ever. In fact, I consider it one of my biggest strengths and the best lesson I learned from observing my mum’s life.
P.S- Like my Dad says each time he asks me a question and I evade it, ‘Jo apne baap pe bharosa nahin karta, woh kiss pe kareega?’ Trust me when I say, trusting people has never worked out well for me. So, no this ain’t going to change!