When one is all of four feet eleven inches tall, plump and waddles like a duck it’s quite amusing and of course pissing off to have uniformed men trying to intimidate you. Sometimes by force, at times with ‘thane le kar chalo’. Jail jane ka to humara bachpan se shauk he!

Kehte he na, ‘Jab Allah Meharban to Gadha Pehalwan’. This Gadha looks like a militant to them. I feel like a big Amazonian woman- Xena warrior princes.

‘Humme kyaa patta apko kisne bheja he!’ Why not, kyuun nahin! Like militants are this stupid that they will send someone who stands out like a sour thumb not someone who totally blends in. The count is twice in six days.’Keep a low profile or you’ll get into trouble,’ yell my friends who have witnessed the militancy of the 90’s. No live videos, henceforth!