It’s supposed to be your day but if I make a fuss, I will hear, ‘pakhand karne ki zaroorat nahi he!’, so one shall refrain. Though, you are far from perfect, as a human being you’re a very interesting character to be around, covering all ends of the spectrum-white, grey and black.
The hardest part about growing up they say, is when you realize that your parents are mere mortals- with their own fallacies and their own insecurities. Your kids became aware of that very early in life. It saved us from being disappointed, later. You may have been an absentee father but there are many admirable traits in you, I’m told, I still unconsciously look for in a man.
The way you always loved your parents inspite of everything. The commitment that mum and you had to staying in the marriage was unreal- messed up, dysfunctional, far from perfect but the marriage vows stating- for poorer or richer, worse and better, in sickness and in health, were truly tested and your marriage survived more than four decades of that! You’re right when you say, I don’t have the temperament for it. But hats off!!
It never ceases to amaze me how obsessed you are with your factory. One always resented how much time you spent there, when we were growing up. But seeing you this past year, when the government and better sense should have convinced you to stay home, you still continued to go there six times a week, inspite of everything, You work harder than anyone I personally know off, have a photographic memory, a wicked sense of humour and are absolutely incapable of mincing your words. There are many things about the world, one has learnt by being around you.
You may have never treated me like most fathers treat their daughters but knowing that you aren’t going to protect me from anyone or anything, has made me fierce, which is great. I don’t really mind being the fixer, the problem solver, I love when you tell people, ‘meri beti handle karti he tede log’ though a call to check whether I’m dead or alive, once in while would be highly appreciated. I know, we have the same dynamics that most men share with their sons, which is alright I guess, confusing but ok. As for the bad stuff, we both are viscous enough to tell each other ever so often, so let’s leave it for today.
Hope you have a long and happy life and you get to travel a bit, make some new friends, experience a life beyond work. Happy Father’s Day, to the man I used to clap for, each time time he returned home. Remain blessed.